Eating Disorders are very manipulative to not only the person suffering, but to those around them. To protect itself, the Eating Disorder can cause the sufferer to lie about their thoughts and behaviors. It attempts to give the illusion that everything is fine or, at least, not as bad as they really are. Yes, you may already recognize how I keep referring to the Eating Disorder as though it’s an entity in and of itself. This is because I’m referring to your Eating Disorder self.
As I have talked about in prior posts, it’s imperative to differentiate your Eating Disorder self from your healthy self. Your Eating Disorder may be very manipulative and cause you to lie to protect itself. You may be a very honest person who values honesty and truth. This dichotomy can be very disturbing to the sufferer as well as their loved ones. It may seem as though the honest person who couldn’t tell a lie now is becoming a manipulative liar. I can see how it may seem that way. But I ask that you, the sufferer, can recognize this as the Eating Disorder and to not judge yourself. And I ask that you, the loved ones of the sufferer, can also take a step back and recognize that this is the Eating Disorder.
It is important to not take this concept as a means to remove yourself from all accountability, since that is not true. The Eating Disorder self can be powerful and it is winning over your healthy self when you lie and twist the truth. You do have accountability in this. Your accountability is to work on what you need to work on to strengthen your healthy self. When you are able to strengthen your healthy self, you are able to combat the deceitful Eating Disorder.
The purpose of this post is to help for you to remove yourself from the judgment that may co-occur once you or a loved one begins to lie in their Eating Disorder. For those suffering, you may find that your loved ones don’t trust you in the same way they once was. It may be really difficult to accept this and it can be very easy to judge yourself for it. However, judging yourself won’t help you. It’ll only hurt you. Instead, look at it like this; your Eating Disorder is causing you to do things that are not in line with your value system. Your Eating Disorder is causing others to not trust you as they once had. Can you blame them? Try to understand their position.
What can you do about it? Come back next week for a guide to help you work with this part of your Eating Disorder so that you can regain the trust of not only your loved ones, but of yourself as well.
I hope you found this post helpful and please share with anyone else or could use it. If you have any questions, concerns or requests for future posts, please leave a comment or message me privately.
I wish you strength on your journey to finding your State of Balance!
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Binge And Restrict Cycle
Eating Disorder Specialist
Healthy Self Vs. Eating Disorder