The Pendulum

“For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.” – Newton’s 3rd Law

At the time, I can say with a decent amount of certainty that Newton was not referring to eating disorders, however, I will argue that it applies. There is an unending cycle that often occurs when a person chooses to restrict their food intake. I find that often times an episode or period of binging or overeating comes after a period of restricting. Many of my clients complain about this occurring, and while a textbook can be written on this topic alone, I’m going to attempt to give it justice in a mere blog post.

As a therapist, I always try to explore the “why” behind these types of things occurring with my clients. Knowing why something happens gives you an understanding, and understanding is what gives us power to do something with that information. With that said, why does this happen? I’ll give 3 points that can help to explain it.

1. Evolution: Let’s look at this from an evolutionary standpoint. Way back when, long before Newton’s time, humans came into existence. At this time, unfortunately, we didn’t have grocery stores that were stocked with food every single day. We had to hunt and gather. This means that food wasn’t always readily available to us. When times occurred where food was plentiful, humans ate what they could to “stock up” for when food became scarce again. This was the difference between survival and death. Though we’ve come a long way, our bodies will always resort to their primitive responses. When we restrict, it looks very similar to what happened to early humans when food was scarce. At a certain point, our bodies will take over. Our bodies will always attempt to push us to do what is necessary for survival. We need food, it is our fuel for life, and your body will not let you forget that. When our bodies take over, it may feel like a strong urge that is seemingly impossible to resist, often leading to overeating or binging. I’ve heard many of my clients express hatred and resentment toward themselves and their bodies, believing that their “willpower” and bodies have failed them. If this is similar to what you experience, please take a second to thank your body. It is fighting for your survival...for your life.
2. All-or-Nothing thinking: Many of us tend to engage in all-or-nothing thinking and this type of thinking is often found in people who struggle with eating disorders. It’s black or white, no gray or other colors in the spectrum exists. This black-and-white or all-or-nothing thinking is not isolated to their eating disorders. It is typically found in most, if not all, areas of their lives. Your black-and-white thinker may be the one who has to get all A’s in school or they “might as well” not even go. They may be the ones who won’t take a sip of alcohol, but if they do, they “might as well” drink until they black-out. They’re the ones who restrict what they eat, but if they eat one thing that wasn’t planned or isn’t “good,” they “might as well” stop at every drive-thru or eat every “bad” thing in the pantry. Notice the subtle “might as well’s” worked in there. That is a typical phrase used amongst all-or-nothing thinkers. If it’s not nothing, it “might as well” be all. An important part of therapy is learning and becoming ok with a couple of B’s or maybe just drinking 1 or 2 drinks when out with friends. It may be learning to eat meals and snacks throughout the day, without it looking like restricting or binging to the point of feeling sick. Life in the gray-zone is balanced, life in the black or white is not.
3. Judgment of food: Many people in our society fall into the trap of labeling foods as “good” or “bad.” People who restrict are restricting because they view certain or all foods as “bad.” Let’s face it, “bad” always has a bit of an appeal to us. It’s normal to just want to rebel a bit. Think about it in this sense; as a child, your parents may have told you “no, you can’t have cookies before dinner” and you snuck it anyways. Or they tell you that you can’t hang out with a certain friend, and you do it anyways. We have a natural tendency to want to rebel a bit. If you continue to label foods as “bad,” there will be a part of you that wants to rebel against it. Since it’s “bad” or forbidden, it has an appeal. We think we have power of sorts over food when we label it, but really, we’re just giving food the ability to have power over us. If you look at a slice of pizza and keep saying to yourself “I can’t have it, I can’t have it, I can’t have it,” you’re going to want it even more and you’re going to want as much of it as you can get.

Now, you may ask why is all of this important. And there’s a few answers I have for that;

1. That old saying “knowledge is power” is very true. When we have an understanding behind why we do things, we can then address the root issue.
2. We can stop viewing ourselves as faulty and stop judging this cycle as a testament of your lack of willpower. There are reasons that this is happening which is greater than what your willpower could or should face.
3. We can take back our power. We have the power over food, not the other way around. Judging food as good or bad gives the power to the food. By realizing this, we can begin working on removing those labels, viewing food as it is which is just food, and reclaiming our power over it.

If you have any thoughts or questions, please leave a comment or message me privately. Also, if you have anything you’d like to learn more about, please let me know and I will do my best to write a post on it soon!

Thank you for reading this and I wish you a State of Balance in your life!